C’est Tout le Ragout!

Dear Mom and Sister,

I created this with you in mind, as you are my most faithful readers. I ate it in solitude this morning, contemplating how much better things seem to taste when consumed in your fine company. As Billie Holliday croons “I Can’t Give You Anything But Love, Baby”, I laugh to myself thinking about Born Yesterday and the uniqueness of family humour. Le sigh. The following recipe is doctored to perfection based on the mistakes I made before drinking coffee.

The the rest of you dumb chumps and crazy broads, here’s a delightful (emphasis on the light) breakfast that will have you holding your pinkies high and clinking your diamond-studded champagne flutes over your health n’ wealth, because it is damn classy.

White Peach, Apricot and Physalis Ragout and Crepes
Ragout
100g physalis, “shelled” and quartered
1 ripe white peach, sliced
1 apricot, cubed
1/4 cup granulated sugar
1/2 tbsp pure vanilla
1/2 cup orange juice
1 tbsp white wine or orange liqueur
1 tbsp butter

Crepes
2/3 cup almond milk
3/4 cup sifted unbleached all-purpose flour
2 eggs (or egg substitute – click here)
pinch of salt
oil for skillet

plain Greek yogurt, optional

Combine fruit in a bowl, sprinkle sugar atop and let stand. In a separate small bowl, combine vanilla, OJ and wine/liqueur. In a small saucepan, melt butter over medium heat. Add fruit and cook for approximately three minutes or until bubbling. Pour in the liquid mixture and bring to a boil, stirring occasionally.

Turn the heat down low and let simmer for ten to fifteen minutes, or until a thicker consistency (don’t wait for it to become jammy, because it won’t, you jammie dodger, you). Remove from heat, or burn your ragout.

Preheat the oven to 170 F (warming temperature) and crank Louis Armstrong, one of my many deceased celebrity crushes.

Whisk flour and milk together. Beat in the eggs and add salt. You will note I beat the eggs and flour together first – DO NOT do this unless you are asking for Lumpelstiltskin to demonize your batter.

Heat the oil in your skillet or frying pan on medium heat. Ladle a, um, ladle-full’s worth of batter in the pan and swirl it around the entire pan, using your wrist? And your brain? Are these instructions making sense?

When cooked through on one side, flip over delicately yet swiftly using a spatula, unless you have finesse and pizazz to flip it using only the pan. When the edges of the crepe are crisp and it is golden brown, place on a dinner plate and into the warmed oven. Repeat until the batter is gone, stacking the crepes in the oven to keep warm.

To plate, I tried two ways. Firstly, I spread Greek yogurt onto the crepe, spooned the ragout and folded it like so:

The alternative, which I prefer, is to fold the crepe into a wedge and spoon the ragout on top. Scoop the yogurt onto the side and garnish with mint leaves or praline (of which I had neither).

The ragout will also make a great topping for cheesecake, methinks.

Enjoy the summer to your greatest capacity! Until next time, eat deliciously and promise me you’ll get to the beach at least once before autumn sneaks up.

Ooey Gooey Ratatouille

Hey there stargazers and daydreamers,

I have a legitimate excuse this time. I was in Ireland. For part of the time that has elapsed since the last entry. To make up for my lack of posts, I am going to entertain you today AND tomorrow! So, I attempted to create ratatouille. I used a skeleton of a recipe from a vegetarian cookbook boasting meals in thirty minutes or less that also have no fat. Recipes like this, I ordinarily do not trust, however, it was surprisingly the only recipe I had from all my cookbooks (bouche bée!). Yet my taste testers gave it a four out of five star rating, which I take credit for because I doctored the recipe.

Ingredients:
1 eggplant, washed and cut into 1/2 inch slices
1 medium yellow onion, halved and thinly sliced
1 large-ish tomato, sliced
2 medium zucchinis, cut into thin slices
3 large garlic cloves
4 tbsp hazelnut oil (or olive, grapeseed)
1 (28-ounce) can herbed crushed tomatoes, drained
1 tbsp thyme
1 tbsp oregano
2 bay leaves
salt n’ peppa to taste
fresh basil, optional

Heat half of the oil in a large skillet. Add onion and sauté over medium heat until 75% translucent. Add zucchini, salt and pepper. Stir, cover and cook for 3-5 minutes. Transfer the somewhat-to-mostly cooked vegetables to a bowl.

Add the remaining oil the the skillet (you will notice I used a pot – BIG MISTAKE). Add eggplant and sauté while stirring carefully so you don’t ruin the fragile and elegant eggplant slices. Add garlic, thyme, bay leaves and half of the crushed tomatoes. Cook for five to ten minutes, stirring semi-frequently so nothing burns.

Place the eggplant & tomato mixture into a separate bowl. Add the remaining tomatoes and oregano to the pot for about two minutes.

Layer the tomato sauce on the bottom of a casserole dish. Then decoratively layer the eggplant, followed by the zucchini and onion. Repeat until you are out of ingredients! Arrange the sliced tomato on top and bake, covered, at 350 C for approximately 30 minutes, or until it is bubbly. Remove the lid and bake another 10 minutes. Garnish with basil et voila! I forgot to photograph the finished product, so this is the pre-bake. It could have been more beautiful. Hopefully the taste made up for the lack of visual enchantment.

That’s a Wrap!

Salutations, Dear Reader. This week I am attempting to create a vegan version of the delicious ‘Yoga Wrap’ which I had at Bohemia, an eclectic, grassroots type bistro in Barrie, Ontario. Bohemia’s wrap is made with chicken, so I decided to replace the main protein component with tofu.

Here are my ingredients:
1 block extra-firm tofu, cubed
1 tbsp fresh minced ginger
2 cloves garlic, crushed
2 tbsp olive oil
3 stalks celery, chopped
1 1/2 cups red grapes, halved
1 granny smith apple, cubed
Juice of one lime
1 cup veganaise, plus extra for spreading
1 tbsp yellow mustard
3 tbsp medium yellow curry powder (or however hot you like it)
1/3 cup fresh cilantro, chopped
salt and pepper, to taste
Some sort of grainy tortilla (I like flax)
Dijon mustard (to spread on wrap)

Begin by heating the oil on medium heat in a frying pan. Add the garlic, ginger and 1 tbsp of the curry powder. Stir frequently so it does not burn for about one minute.

Add the tofu to the pan and allow the spices to coat the tofu completely. Turn the heat down and let it simmer. (This photo is pre-coated tofu)

While the tofu is simmering, chop your fruits and vegetables! I realize the ginger is in this photo, that should already be chopped and in your pan. My order of taking these was boofy whack, y’all.

Stir your tofu to make sure it hasn’t stuck to the bottom of the pan and burned, then toss all the freshly chopped goodies in a decently sized bowl and admire your handiwork.

Add the lime juice, veganaise, mustard, curry powder, and salt and pepper.

Give it stir! Give it a whirl! Add the tofu and taste some of that bizz-nazz, because it’s the shiz-nazz.

Grab a wrap, spread the desired amount of veganaise and dijon on there. Scoop as much or as little of your filling upon the wrap.

Wrap up that big (or small) boy! MANGEZ!

I served this to a guest who gave it a four (out of five) star rating. It was pretty good, but I think something was missing. I may add more salt next time, or more garlic, maybe some red chili flakes. It was tasty but missing a little ‘zip’. The ‘Yoga Wrap’ has red onions in theirs, which may have been the missing link. Regardless, give it a try and let me know what you think in the comments below!

Happy eating to you, my Dear Reader.

Fiesta Siesta

Greetings, fellow humans. Today I am sharing a vegetarian dish that is an attempted copy of a mexican eggs benny that I had at The Nook in Winnipeg, Manitoba, which I definitely recommend should you find yourself in Manitoba.

I made only enough for one, because it is only dear Hector and I here and he does not care for Mexican cuisine all that much, so the following list of ingredients is for the solitary diner:

-half an avocado
-a biscuit-size slice of polenta
-chunky salsa (I like medium or spicy)
-one egg
-two tomato slices
-half a pepper
-lemon juice (I prefer fresh), approximately 1 tbsp
-small clove of garlic
-salt and pepper
-chili powder, optional
-field greens, optional

I began by mashing together in a small bowl the half avocado, lemon juice (a firm squeeze’s worth from half a fresh lemon), garlic and a sprinkle of chili powder for a makeshift guacamole. I shall call this version ‘lemomole’.
It was so delicate and fresh tasting. It inspired me to revisit Pablo Neruda’s “A Lemon”, which is a favorite poem of my sister. Here is an excerpt:

We open
the halves
of a miracle,
and a clotting of acids
brims
into the starry
divisions:
creation’s
original juices,
irreducible, changeless,
alive:
so the freshness lives on
in a lemon,
in the sweet-smelling house of the rind,
the proportions, arcane and acerb.

Cutting the lemon
the knife
leaves a little cathedral:
alcoves unguessed by the eye
that open acidulous glass
to the light; topazes
riding the droplets,
altars,
aromatic facades.

After staring into the lemon half for who knows how long, I sliced the pepper lengthwise.
Then I put a little oil into a skillet and set it on a medium heat. When it was hot, I added the polenta.
After about two minutes, I flipped the polenta and cracked the egg into the opposite side of the skillet.
Then I let them cook and sizzle. I feel like this is something you should just know how to do. Frying eggs and cornmash should be a no-brainer, which is how I felt when making this meal. Like a zombie. Inspired by poetry.

I added the peppers to the pan on a whim after flipping the egg. I wasn’t really sure where I was going with the peppers, to be honest, so I just threw a little salt and pepper on them and let them fry for a bit.
I then transferred the polenta onto a bed of field greens and stacked tomato, then egg, salsa, lemomole and a quarter of a tomato slice (why not?). I added the fried peppers to the side of the plate and presto magic, a meal.
It was okay. I think this would have been far tastier on a bed of lime and chili marinated roasted potatoes, onions and peppers. The salsa and lemomole truly made this dish. In fact, I might just have to praise the lemon and say that it alone brought life to this dish. It was both a party and a nap, because some bites were incredible and others were boring. Hence, this dinner was a fiesta siesta. What can I say, hasta los gatos quieren zapatos.

p.s. – I don’t know Spanish.

I’m Lovin’ It

Well, it’s still April so I made it! My new kitchen has already been put to good use, though sometimes the kitchen sink is the most useful, especially when eating pickled beets in a rush. My new roommate and I have hit it off considerably well, and though he’s not much help when it comes to cooking, he has a wonderful singing voice. Dear Reader, I introduce Hector:

Today I deliver a failure – albeit a delicious failure – of my first scratch veggie burger. The basis of my recipe came from the Veganomicon cookbook, which I highly recommend for the vegan who is bored with the usual fare and knows their way around the kitchen.

Alright, so here’s the skinny. I was waiting for the bus by a McDonald’s and the smell of grease gave me the McCravings, until I heard the faint ‘udderance’ of sad moos on the wind, and decided to attempt a homemade veg burger. I thought of using a roasted portobello in lieu of a patty, but thought again when I found the recipe for Chickpea Cutlets (Veganomicon, p 133). Unfortunately, I was missing some key ingredients – namely solitary chickpeas, vital wheat gluten, thyme and paprika. I also didn’t want to make 4 cutlets in case they turned out poorly, so here is how I doctored the recipe:

1/2 can of fava beans & chickpeas1 tbsp olive oil
1/4 c whole oats
2 tbsp hemp hearts
1 tbsp soy sauce
2 cloves garlic, crushed or minced
splash of white cooking wine
the juice of half a lemon
1/2 tsp sage
salt & pepper
(and, if I’m truthful, other spices that I just don’t remember. I’ll have a sticky note next time, I swears!)

I mashed all the ingredients with a fork until it was a thick, mold-able paste and then proceeded to mold them into patty shapes. What I should have done, just in case (and what you should do), is start by mashing the beans and oil and then add the remaining ingredients in a timely fashion. I’m sure my food processor would have been brilliant as well. Anyway, if your paste is too doughy and not sticky at all, then add some water or vegetable stock until it feels moist and holds its shape. If it is too soggy like magic putty, then add flour until it holds its shape.

Heat up some oil in a skillet at medium-high heat. Heat those puppies up about 7-8 minutes on each side. Behold, les burgers.

So what makes a burger delicious? The toppings. I started with delicious, nutritious avocado. Instead of slicing it up, I did a quick mash-up with some Sriracha. I call it ‘whackamole’.

PAUSE: Please, Dear Reader, stop calling it “seer-ee-atch-ee”, if you call it that. It is spelled s-r-i-r-a-c-h-a which reads SREE-ROTCH-AH. I forgive you this once. Never rhyme this sauce with mariachi again.

Ahem, continuing on. The line-up for the toppings were Veganaise, whackamole, tomato slices, romaine lettuce, BBQ sauce and sauerkraut. Get creative, though and make yours exactly how you like it! Red onions? Artichoke hearts? Caramelized pineapple? Tell me how you stack up your veggie burger.

You may be wondering, how did I fail? Where did all this deliciousness go wrong? It was the lack of a binding agent, so the patty was more of a barely held together fried bean paste. Which was incredibly tasty but messy. Next time, I will try to amend this. More patty adventures to come. In the mean time, eat well, Frittatas.

 

Razz My Berries

Dear Favorite Person, a.k.a you,

Hello. I have missed you, truly. Unfortunately, I am not the She Chef you fell in love with, and have changed my kitchen several times. Meat is off the menu, so we’re going to get even crazier with experiments! The recipes will be mostly vegan, some vegetarian (when I’m feeling cheesy).

I feel pretty fearless in the kitchen, so regardless of if my meal is a fail or a win, you will get to experience the good and the bad with me. I vow, for delicious or unsavory, in calamity or fortune, for rotten or ripe, in rain or shine, I will share photos and provide weekly recipes starting in April, 2013.

Here is an example of the treats you can look forward to making! Mmm, marinated portabellas on a bed of pesto & artichoke tossed spinach rice linguine, with a side of boiled beets. What’s that brown spot, you ask? Well, I like BBQ sauce with my beets.

Curious? Enticed? Stay tuned…